Let’s say you find yourself at the foot of a mountain in rural Washington, looking for clarity, peace of mind and maybe a little free rehab. Then they say, “There’s no God, go sit on the floor for 10 days straight.” Lights out at 9 pm with no dinner and no talking. Of course I’m [...]
Tags:animals·buddhism·jesse·magic·money·too personal·weird·work
1. This one time in 1999 I aol instant messaged Wiley Wiggins, the star of Waking Life. He was in the middle of a chat with someone else and half the sentence bled over so he had to talk to me. It wasn’t a very good conversation. 2. Again, sometime circa 1999, Matt Bellamy of [...]
Tags:list·music·too personal
Dear Diary, I can’t remember why I moved to Seattle. I know I must have made the decision at some point, but I don’t know what prompted it. Why Seattle specifically, I mean. Nevertheless. I’ve been here since January 2nd. Jesse and I broke up right after Halloween, but we kept living together and behaving [...]
Tags:depression·dreams·jesse·magic·not writing·seattle·too personal·travel·work
Let me just get this out of the way and tell you, in case you’re not my facebook friend or you missed it: Our beagles were kidnapped. The lady who gave them to us on craigslist had a change of heart and scooped them back up. It’s very sad. That afternoon while we were out [...]
The house I moved into has a white picket fence around it, which is hilarious because inside we’re living out a Raymond Carver story, the early years, the stripped down Gordon Lish horror show years, but with YouTube. We listen to a lot of sad ballads on YouTube. Earlier in the week, my roommate Jesse [...]
Tags:jesse·love·music·too personal·weird
LAST NIGHT I met David Gates for dinner at the Depot around 6:30. I heard he was back in town and I wanted to talk to him about literature and maybe ask him what I should do with my life. David wrote two books in the 90s called Jernigan and Preston Falls. These books are [...]
Tags:animals·buddhism·film·love·magic·missoula·my novel·too personal·writing
I woke up feeling pretty terrible. I sleep in a shack with the door wide open so the cat can come in and out. The sun shone down on me like a baby in a goddamn manger. The shack isn’t the terrible part. I’m not unhappy about waking up in a shack. Of late I have [...]
Tags:animals·austin·buddhism·depression·dreams·missoula·portland·too personal·travel·weird
Everybody says that your thirties are better, and I believe them. Seems to me like the fire inside of you burns steadier, that you care less what other people think. There’s more grace to be had from knowing from experience, instead of having to act strong and guess all the time. It feels like a very [...]
Tags:detroit·dreams·love·too personal
Not to alarm everyone, but my little stone house is haunted. There are big brown spiders. I’ve seen two so far, or it might be the same one. The first time I picked him up in a towel and shook him outside. Then I watched him immediately scurry into a crevice near the doorstop, so [...]
Tags:film·my novel·too personal
Weirdest thing. My throat chakra is all sorts of fucked up and I’m having a hard time communicating. Been downstairs in the lab brewing up some new life plans. I think about what a weirdo I am all the time and try often to come up with stunts to seem cool and casual and less [...]
Tags:love·not writing·sorry·too personal
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